I come from a very small, close-knit family. In 2005, I began a path of what felt like a relentless dark night of the soul. Advocating and caring for, with diligence, the health of my family of origin, my own emotional and physical well-being, and then experiencing intense grief, taught me the role of Gratitude in the face of pain. The faces of pain are as unique as the person impacted by it but staying in the mind set and practice of gratitude can be universal.
See the face of the man struggling to find food but smiling. The person who does not know where her child will sleep that night, but she is singing. How? What do they know?
For me, my only sibling, Geri, faced every single test, procedure, transplant, pain, and more, with such a valiance and grace it still takes my breath away. She passed on after three years and though I could not contain the grief in one place because it overwhelmed me so, my gratitude for her life, her essence never lost; our bond, those who loved her through it, and Laughter gave me sustenance. We had always loved laughing together and in the midst of the unavoidable indignities the medical odyssey presented, we laughed. Tears of laughter during a time we referred to as "Is this a play?" It all felt so surreal. I am so grateful we had that.
During that time, grief and vigilance ruled the days for so long, and it gave birth to an intentional daily practice of gratitude expression. Journal, spiritual rituals and pursuits, daily offerings of this to those I love. But it could be holding your hand over your heart and just uttering thank you. That alone is powerful.
It is repair, regeneration, and a friend. Gratitude means positive things can come from the most negative outcomes. Doors open, windows appear; the possibilities show evidence and value of life still rooted here. And that can be hard to do.
Those with the greatest suffering often model joyful, courageous, generous spirits. And they know far more about the art of gratitude than I, but it shows we can be grateful no matter what is. That part is a choice.